First Last Class.. .
Today was my last official class with my freshmen on the north campus. It didn't go particularly well. I didn't give very clear instructions causing some confusion and I've become more and more lax about forcing them to use English for all their discussion. I think it's because I understand Chinese enough to know they are still talking about the material we are learning. Next week I will be meeting with them in pairs of two to conduct a final coneversation exam to see if I actually taught them anything. I sure hope I did.Today was my last official class with my freshmen on the north campus. I've probably spent more time with these students than any other adding together all the 'Free Talks' I've had. A few weeks ago I visited some of the guys' dorm room. They cleaned up and welcomed me in to fruits and snacks. We sat around the table, chatted about their room set up, their Chinese names, and even potential love interests. They sang some Chinese opera for me and we all joined together in a rousing rendition of 'Uptown Girl.' Some of the gal students took me out to the side streets outside of campus. We talked about what they like to do in their free time, their perceptions of college, and even took those sticker pictures at a local gift shop. After the pictures I took them to the small art gallery on campus and checked out the student photography. Later I chatted with another group of girls about their favorite music while listening to Jay Chou and other theme songs from various Korean Dramas in my office.
Today was my last official class with my freshmen on the north campus. Most of my classes are upperclassmen and on the south campus. This makes north campus a specially distinct space. South campus, despite it's newness in architecture and technology, sits in the middle of empty fields and noisy construction. It carries the air of an upperclassmen's worries and concerns for their future, their jadedness with a lot of modern culture, the pressures of reality and society closing in. North campus is a lot greener, filled with trees to accompany the old, run down dorms and teaching buildings. For what they lack in modernity they make up for in character. This campus, simply because I only teach freshmen there, is a space of innocence and newness; a place where new students are just beginning their journey with optimism. It's a shame I won't be going back there too often in the future.
Today was my last official class with my freshmen on north campus. I wished them an ambigious farewell and good luck with their future studies, which doesn't feel like a real goodbye. As Chinese students, they are perceptive to subtlties that American students would miss. After telling them I was thankful for the opportunity to teach them, they almost gasped in unison. Soon after came whispers, a few students outright asking me if I meant that next semester I'd be gone. I gave them the Chinese answer of "I don't know, it's up to my superiors," which pretty much means "Yes, I'll be gone." I begin to feel wetness in my eyes. The sight of my students smiling, chatting, watching me and wondering. I say it again, "Thank you so much for the opportunity to teach you. You are my first freshmen class and will always be very special to me." With that I gather my things and begin to leave. As I step out I hear my students wish me a joyfully innocent goodbye. I'm not ashamed to say it, when I got back to my office I cried, albeit only for a minute or two.
Today was my last official class with my freshmen on north campus. A month or so ago I found out I wouldn't be teaching them anymore and my heart broke. Yet in that breaking a different sort of passion grew out of it. A passion for them to know father, to find meaning, to live in such a way that can transform. If nothing else, to see them transcend the jaded hopelessness I see in many of my upperclass students. If nothing else, to see them again on the other side of eternity. I am sure there will never be a class like them ever again. I think they mean a lot more to me than maybe I mean to them. Either way, I now lay them in the hands of someone bigger than me and I trust that they will be taken care, trust that they will be loved, trust that they will come to know Truth and Hope.
I have to trust.. .
posted by Unknown @ 10:41 AM
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